Confessions of a Late Mom

Tardy Bells

It would be great to be on time for school if it weren’t completely impossible. I would actually LOVE to be the kind of person that arrives early to places.  In fact, I admire all the people that do manage to get their kids to school on time.  I even wave to them as they drive away from the school on their way to work or as they begin their tasks of the day even though I’m just pulling into the School Zone.  As is common in our school community, we park our van a block away from the school so the kids and I can walk up to the school together. But as we get out of the car, we hear the school’s first bell ring!  We hustle along, late as usual, as I try to convince my daughter she really does have time to finish her bagel before she gets into her classroom.

We arrive at the door and give our big hugs and share our special send-off wave to each other, and as the kids turn to walk through the threshold of the school, we hear the second (late) bell ring.  I take a deep breath, say a prayer for them, and turn to walk back to my car… And that’s when I see my people: the parents that are getting their kids to school at the same time or later than me.  I see the kid running to the building with his backpack half zipped trying to get in before the door locks and hear the mom shouting, “BYE! I love you! Have a good day!” as he runs ahead of her.  I see the Dad walking his daughter to school wearing her backpack in hopes that it helps her walk a little faster. I smile at my people and hope they know I’m not judging them – that I’m one of them! 

Excuses! Excuses!

“My people” and I all have different reasons (excuses) for being late, and I recognize that not all of them are as habitually “exactly on time” or “barely late” as I am, but the struggle is real for all of us! For me, it’s primarily a two-fold issue: (1) I used to be a Professional School Counselor and I know how critical it is for kids to have a loving, orderly start to their school day; and, yet, (2) nearly every single morning I have an exhaustive internal battle deciding whether to even wake my kids up at a reasonable time.  On the one hand, I know that on weekends they magically wake up on their own at 7:00 AM, despite my efforts to persuade them and remind them to, “Sleep in tomorrow, OK?  It’ll be Saturday! No school! You can sleep as long as you want!”  I also know that when they sleep until their bodies are ready to wake up, the rest of their day goes smoother because they received all the rest their bodies needed.  My 7 year old son is great at waking up on his own, rested and ready for the day!  He usually wakes up around 6:45 AM, gets dressed, has breakfast, makes my coffee, and then plays until it’s time to go.  I thank him for my coffee and continue wondering when the girls will wake up. As the minutes tick by, I start to be anxious about them sleeping too late so I turn on the hall lights. I tell my son he doesn’t have to play so quietly since the girls should be waking up soon and decide to give them 5 more minutes.  However, now it’s 7:20 AM and our odds of punctuality are plummeting, so I better wake up the girls! 

Logically, it’s reasonable to think that the girls are capable of putting their clothes on and shoveling cereal into their mouths within a 30 minute timeframe.  However, even though their clothes are laid out, their water bottles are full of water, their folders are (usually) signed, and their lunchboxes are full and ready to go (thanks, honey!), somehow nearly every morning it’s around 7:40 that my oldest tells me something along the lines of wanting to try a new hairstyle that only she knows how to do. It’s around 7:44 when my youngest daughter tells me that none of her skirts fit anymore even though school’s only been in session for 3 weeks.  Miraculously, I find a few different skirts for her to try out of the hand-me-down bin and one fits!  It’s 7:48 and everyone finally has socks on and it’s feeling like punctuality is within reach!  But then my son sees that I made a bagel for his sister and asks if he can have one too since it’s been an hour since his first breakfast and his lunch isn’t until 1:00 PM.  His request is too reasonable to deny and then girls ask if they can play in the backyard for “just 2 minutes” while I make his bagel.  Who can say no to them wanting to play together outside before school?!  For just 2 minutes?!  Finally everyone goes to the car and buckles up and is handed their buttered bagel and we see the time. Once again we all agree that we’re likely to be “exactly on time” today or maybe “just a crumb late,” as my youngest says, but at least we’re all rested and prepared for the day, we had a little fun, and no one yelled.  

Maybe tomorrow, we’ll try again to be early…or at least closer to “on time.”