My 4-Year-Old Does Chores
When I was a kid, I was expected to help out around the house. I don’t have a memory of when my parents decided I was old enough to do chores, but I do remember becoming old enough to do different things: vacuum, mop, clean the bathroom… I was responsible for keeping the areas that were “mine” clean. Because of that, as an adult, having a neat house has become like second nature to me.
Laundry is still my arch nemesis, but we won’t even go there.
As a parent, it has always been my goal to teach my son to be responsible and take pride in the things he has, as well as contribute to our family and not expect everyone to do everything for him. The last thing I want is to raise an entitled adult that doesn’t understand he needs to wash his dishes and throw away trash in order to avoid having his house condemned.
So how did I start my son doing chores? It was easy, really…
- We decided what duties our son can handle. I stumbled across this chart of age-appropriate chores for children a while ago, and it’s been a great resource for our family. I use this chart to decide what’s appropriate to expect from my son, and have adjusted his chores over time according to what we feel he can handle.
- We set expectations and rewards. My son is very goal-oriented. If he knows that clearing his dishes after every meal for a week will earn us a family day at the zoo, then he’s all over those dishes. This is our way of avoiding the whole “allowance” thing–he still earns things by doing chores, but they’re usually experiences as opposed to toys or money.
- We maintain consistency. This has been the most difficult for us. Family vacations, summer, and changes in our routine have made it easy for us to let things go. But consistently expecting our son to do certain things like pick up his room and help feed the dogs has made these things feel like less of a chore and more like something he just does without being reminded.
- We use Homey. There is this app {and it’s FREE} called Homey. It helps our family with all three of the previous points: assigning tasks, setting rewards, and maintaining consistency. It also gives our son some accountability, which has helped tremendously.
How does Homey work?
We use Homey to track all of the chores that need to be done in our house. You can set them to be recurring, and even change the number of times a day a chore needs to be completed. For example, we expect our son to bring his plate to the sink after every meal. You can set “clear the table” to be a recurring chore three times a day. You can also set chores that are only done on certain days, like taking out the trash.
Our family has also found it helpful to include everyone’s chores in the Homey app. It’s helped everyone realize how much each of us contributes to the housework, and has actually increased appreciation and recognition for a lot of the everyday duties Dad and I do. It has been eye-opening for our son to see how much all of us do, not just him.
Homey helps us keep an eye on what has and hasn’t been done each day, and also allows us to set rewards. Parents have the ability to set different amounts of points to be earned for each chore, and can set how many points are required to achieve a certain reward. Users are able to see their progress and how far they have to go until they meet a goal and achieve a reward.
