46 Things My Kids Have Learned during Covid-19 Quarantine

Everyone’s Quarantine Life is a little different. Mine consists of 4 kids: an 11 yr old boy, twin 8 year old boys, and a 6 year old girl. I understand that my kids are supposed to be engaging in virtual learning sessions and crafts to enhance their home-based learning. They’re doing that, minus the crafts, but they have also picked up a few new skills too. Some of the skills are beneficial, while some are quite questionable. Here 46 things my kids have learned during Covid-19 Quarantine: (Psst…and none of it is school related.)

How to tell if mommy has a virtual meeting. (She has a fancy shirt on with her pajama bottoms.)
How to do your own laundry.
What happens when you let another kid ride your bike.
Never wake a sleeping mom.
How to wash dishes by hand.
How to build a raised garden bed.
How to read an eviction notice. (The twins were evicted from their bedrooms and had to sleep in the playroom/garage.)
How to pour a beer.
What the going rate for the Tooth Fairy is.
How the Tooth Fairy must practice social distancing. (Seriously, we had 2 kids lose a total of 5 teeth. We BROKE!)
How to start a fire.
How to measure and administer your own allergy meds.
How to know when your underwear is too tight.
That homeschool is a real thing.
How to ride a bike without training wheels.
How to fix Dad, an essential worker, a cocktail after a long day.
The importance of speaking kind words to people and plants.
How to close doors quietly and sneak around the house at 2am.
Why composting is important. (Thanks Compost Fairy!)
The meaning of “Don’t start no stuff, won’t be no stuff.”
What the word “mate” means.
How to clean with the intention of it being less dirty.
Every word from Descendants movies 1, 2 and 3!
How to use a debit card online.
The best way to ask rich Uncle for money.
Why not to disturb mommy when she locks herself in the car.
How to play marbles.
That bath bombs don’t replace soap. (You still must use soap!)
Superglue and ducktape can fix a multitude of things.
That dying is not the same as hungry.
How to email mommy (There’re only so many hypothetical theory scenarios a person can take. Just email me and I’ll get back to you….eventually.)
How to throw trash out of the window when cleaning your room. (#dadcleaning)
That people need to stop eating sea animals, but cows can die.
When the cat doesn’t want to be picked up.
Why it’s important to have space from your sibling.
A dog can eat an entire loaf of bread.
Appropriate reasons to call you brother a weirdo. (There aren’t any.)
How to get your shoes from on top of the shed.
Not everyone is a “Fold Person.” My daughter doesn’t believe in folding clothes.
How to BeyBlade.
How long you can wear pajamas before they start to smell.
Why Dads need facials too.
How to drift on a bike.
Ingredients you CANNOT make slime out of.
How to climb a tree.
Not all poop is good poop.

This is just a snippet of what they have learned during this Covid-19 Quarantine. Now that school is “out” I can only plead that they learn things that won’t cause them mental of physical harm.