I know that’s an odd thing to hear. As mothers, we’re supposed to teach our children how to respect us. So why would I say that about my son?

Because I’m a stepmom.

My son is my son, no ifs, ands, or buts. But sometimes what he calls me changes. And that’s ok.

Sometimes when I’ve had a long day of work, I pick him up from daycare and get caught up in the little things like cleaning the house and finishing homework. I get ready to tuck him in and finally unwind, kiss him on the head, and hear, “I love you, mom.”

Other days, he smiles up at me while running errands and says, “Did you know you’re the best stepmom in the world?”

Some people have suggested that I should correct him - in both names. As though I should either force my son to call me mom or force him to call me stepmom. My response is, and always will be, “He can call me whatever he wants.”

My role will always be the same. I’m the person who taught him how to wash his hands and count to thirty. The one who fostered his love for Legos and sent him to time-out for giving the dog a cookie. I’m the woman who tutored him all summer to get him ready for kindergarten, taught him how to hang his clothes, and wiped his tears when he fell off his bike. To this little boy, I am many things. But most importantly, I am his family.

There is no reason in my mind that I should make him call me anything. I love my role, and him calling me different things on different days will never change who I am to my son.

When he started Kindergarten, his favorite thing to tell every new teacher was, “I have TWO moms!” I love his joy and appreciation at such a young age for what he has, and it has taught me so much about my own gratitude. I am so GRATEFUL for my role! When I met my husband, I had no idea how incredible the gift of shaping a human being was going to be. In marriage, I gained not only an incredible husband, but a whole new world of somedays being a mom and somedays being a stepmom. And every one of those days is a gift.