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I’m Done Apologizing for Being Myself

I hate to be all cliché about how wisdom comes with age – but it’s the truth. As I approach my 45th birthday, I can honestly say I’ve never been happier with who I am as a person. Are there things I need to work on? Sure. But there’s nothing like self-love despite your imperfections. It’s a comfortable place to be.

So, I’ve decided to make this public declaration. Here’s a list of things I will no longer be apologizing for:

  1. My body – Are there things I’d like to change about my body and my health? Yes. I want to lose weight, drink more water, and exercise more. But how my body is today is just how my body is today, and I need to appreciate it more. It took me through a dance career, world travels, and two precious babies. So, thanks, body. I promise I’ll try to take better care of you.                                                                                                      woman looking at herself in the mirror
  2. My side hustles – I do a lot of things. Like a lot, a lot. I have a near-full-time job as a content director, I sell cabi, I sell Finding Foxtale, I paint and sell my artwork, I serve on the board at my children’s school, I sit on my town’s Public Art Commission, I’m a sustainer in the Junior League, and I write for this mom blog! All in addition to being a parent, a wife, a daughter. Several people have been known to give me side-eye about it, but I’m not going to keep apologizing for my desire to be busy. You know what they say: if you want something done, give it to a busy person. I have to say that is probably 100 percent true with me. So, I might be busy; but I get ish done.
  3. My children’s quirks – Unconditional love, y’all. Need I say more? My kids get whiny some days…but they are tired toddlers. They might make an “unconventional” toy choice…but they are growing into little humans with extraordinary personalities. They are loud in the grocery store…but they are kids, people. They sleep in mom and daddy’s room a little too much…but they are still my little babies. So, unless they hurt someone else physically or emotionally, there is really no need for me to be apologizing for them.
  4. My beauty practices – I’ve become a little more high-maintenance in my 40s. But I’m here for it. I get regular facials. I get my brows tinted and waxed every month. I get my hair done religiously every four weeks. I might have just lost my Botox virginity. And I’m absolutely addicted to eyelash extensions. But I refuse to feel guilty about these things because they make me feel good. And a happy person is a kinder person. See? I’m really just doing all of this to make y’all’s lives better!                                                    woman looking in car mirror
  5. My sobriety – I stopped drinking alcohol in 2015, and it has made a huge impact on my life. I am so appreciative of the journey I’ve been on, and I’m very proud of accomplishing nearly a decade of sobriety. But I have to stop apologizing for it. If someone offers me a drink, I often say, “I’m sorry. I don’t drink.” Why am I sorry? I’m not sorry at all. Gotta stop doing that.
  6. My no-makeup face – Life is busy (ahem, see item No. 2). And sometimes, I ain’t got no time for makeup. I used to feel like I had to apologize, e.g., “I’m so sorry for my no-makeup face. I was rushing out the door this morning.” Why do I feel the need to say that? Do I think I’m the first busy momma to go somewhere without makeup on? People don’t have to wear makeup every day ... or any day, for that matter. No big deal.
  7. My love of naps – I don’t know if it’s age-related or what, but I don’t sleep very well at night. However, on that rare occasion about once per week, I get to take a nap. I don’t know why, but daytime sleep is like GOLD. It’s so luxurious and amazing. And, oftentimes, my littlest will fall asleep on me and we will take a little co-nap. That’s something I won’t get to do much longer, so I’m soaking it up bigtime. No apologies.      woman not apologizing for napping on the couch
  8. My enthusiasm – I’m a generally happy person. Sometimes, I’m a little over-the-top. Sometimes, I’m a little goofy. Sometimes, I get a little too excited about things and go all-in on new tasks and projects. But I’m done apologizing for my positivity. You know who needs to apologize? All those Grumpy Gusses for messin’ up my vibe! The world would be better if y’all would lose the attitude.

Anyway, I guess the overarching point is this: I am me. That’s the only person I know how to be. Love it or leave it, but I will no longer apologize. And I suggest you adopt the same philosophy. Just be yourself. As they say, everyone else is taken.

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